~* MY LIfE SUcCkKS 8~~!!

Everyone has a better life than I am. I bet !! Since i'm the one who has a family that is not understanding. My family stayed by my side ever since I was born. They love me, care for me n help me everytime. But that doesnt mean that i'm useless,am i??! I had done sooo many things that u didn't know n u don't know! I tried my best everytime n never say a single thing abt it!! Even I had, I just want to find a topic to talk to u guys! I want a happy family! I done soo many things that make myself disgrace n u just tell me that I 'm not good enough??! Whats u point bro?? I am the victim here! I'm the one who is always helped u ! I'm the one who always support u n make u life filled with laughter!! And now here u  abandoned  and Throw me away?? What is it that u doesn't satisfied with me?? I had done my besttt!!! What u wan from me? and when i ask u that question, u said nothing? NOTHING?? u sure?? no ur not!! U just say I'm sharin, share my ass!! Share what?? Ur logics? Ur irresponssible additude?? What the helL?? u know what I am thinking?? U know?? u don't even know when I was born or what I had done when u r not here in the house!! U just a nerd n a freak who SEEMS like studying like hell n bragging things here n there! U dunno what I am! U dunno what I think! Cause u never will!! Human's mind r complicated! If u can read my mind , r u a pyscho?? or u just not a human?? Stop talking bullshit!! u know nothing! And i mean NOTHING! U dun know me!! U never is my brother! I never think u r one! If u wanna be one, but i don't want it! Talk abt what now? U never been a person I can learned from! Ur face disgusts me! just like u disgusts someone whom u havent talk to for like a few years! No ! maybe to the future! u never had talk to him! U just think he hurt u but he doesnt!! u just think u know everthing n u r right n i am wrong! What the heck was that?? If u wan to talk abt me, talk this to urself! learn it urself! before u have the rights to talk to me like this!! I dun wan it! shish!!!



Let me tell u something..
      A person receiving ur bragging n so called "logic" isn't the worst..
But is that u doesn't belive in me ...
          That u despise me....               That u doesn't understand MY LIFE N MY WAY! 


Think about it when u saw this idiot!! I dun care if u dint saw it anyway...!

~88 Seriusly!! I DAMN Hate MY BRO!!!88

Today ,  not gonna talk abt weather forcast , friends or whatever i said before. I'm just gonna Scold my fucking idiotic stupid brother!!! LIsten ! VEry carefully!!! HE is a weirdo who is older than me and lazier , more idiotic , more unindependent , more irritating stupid brother!!!!!@@ He thinks he knows everything n acts like high n mighty everytime he talks 2 someone.!! He just thinks that he is the only single person who had more knowledge n wisdom than anyone had!! He just thinks that he's better than anyone!!! He's additude r like fucking hard to belive !! HE doesn't respect n ignores ppl when someone did sum little mistakes!! He fucking disagree with someone by showing his idiotic additude!! Exspecially when it comes to elder ppl!! He never ever ever shows respect to them who had more fucking experiance than he had!! Everything n everytime he just shout " momi momi!!!" what the hell was that?? Do i hav to remind u that u r a older brother who r the one who helps???!! NOt depending on OUR mother to do sumthin !!! Such childish n irresponssible additude u have is just fucking ddisgusting!!!!! !!! WHo u thinks u r ???!! dumbass???!?!!! I"m not gonna say " its alright" like our mom will!! JUst fuck offf myy life !! U r just digracing it and disturbing!!! Its like u r the remaining dish that we doesn't wantttt!!!! So just get off!! I dun ever gonna help u again!! IDiot!! GO die somewhere else!! X((((( I dun wanna even see u !! I never think u as my bro for like when i was born!!! U r  NOT MY BROTHER!!! AND U'LL NEVER BE!!

*? Should I SaY BOnjOuR?**

Today , a nice weather , as u say , Sunny day. Not even a slightest drop of rain falls like a broken necklace , one by one undoubtly on the floor in my area here. Quite suits my taste. With my companies , a bright n cheerful sun who shines sparklingly throughout the days I'hav been through. Numbered puffy n pure white colour like a bottles of mashmallows accidentally droped on the sky spreading over the floor with different kinds of shape n figures. Such artistic art that I wished I could just sleep back on the wide green field n look up to the sky playing with clouds until I falls asleep like a baby.  There isn't  a word that can specifically tells the beautiful colours n unlimited nature that always stayed by my side ,  either is morning or night. The wonderful weather makes me feel energetic n also at the same time quiet n peace. Today may be the best day for outdoors. I can go for....sports? Shopping with my friends? Spending randomly family time together? Goin for a ride? or....just stayed at my house? I rather choose stayed. As I says. Nothing stays forever. But , one of my friend says " If  it just a minute of time , then let it be. If it just a minute of happiness. Then I'll be glad." Thats one of my favourite passage treasures deep inside my heart. Just one minute is enough for me to look through every happiness I feel... Just one minute I can do so many things that r countable. Things , will starts and ends in their way. Starts and ends. Starts and ends. Starts and ends.. But it will come back again. like a movie. Again n again. again n again. again n again. until u choose to changed. thats what I mean. Dun let it start again n ends the same. Just changed. Then it'll be different. Different from the start. =)) I'll changed little by little. One by One. So, things can stay forever in my mind



Even is ..for a minute.

?* MY LiFe HorRiBle VeRsiOn ? *

Once I started this.I had made a decision that I had to post something. Its a memory of mine in the past October 2010. It was a horrible memory of mine.I bet i can't forget my fear from that memory where I started to hate myself. I had friends. They r normal and unresistable accompanies.They r funny n caring. I started to became their friends unrealizingly for one year. I fear but at the same time I loved them. What I fear is somethin they won't tell but tells at ur back. I feared U be gone by the time I realized how good u r. I feared that u actually being nice just for urself. In this decades, pouring water on a friend when their birthday comes can be called a normal thing for our teenagers. Because of that, I tried once n I lost my dignity. I wanted to do that ages ago.Because it looked fun. I wanted to see them laugh. but instead they were shocked n dissapointed. I wonder why. I wonder if I'm not the person who can do it? or can't I do it? Is it wrong to have an experiance in everythin? even....it is a child's play? I'm not mad but ...ashamed. Ashamed of what I had done. Ashame of copying some ridiculous action. Ashamed of havin caring friends. I done it anyway. So regret means nothing . I know how they feel. I do. yet, I 'm helpless. Even I knew. They won't tell me directly. Scared me getting hurt? scared that I'm mad? No. I'm scared that u won't tell. Scared that u don't get angry. Thats what I'm afraid. .

Not tellin the truth doesn't make me happy.
       Not tellin the truth doesn't make u satisifed.
Not tellin the truth doesn't make u caring or kind.
      Not tellin the truth just because u can't? or just ScAreD?  =((

*? My life ---------- A movie ..?

My life is like a very very very long movie..but yet it doesn't have a title ..but It won't be havin one..so that I'm free from control n can acts as my way that is different from others..Everythin has a introduction. Of course.mine is also the similar. My life starts with givin birth from my beloved n caring mother although she doesn't like one who shows her emotions honestly but still.I can feel Love from her.Then, kindergarden , primary ,  and now, secondary. Yup. I'm a secondary student and I kinda love it. I won't be talkin abt friend , classmates , teachers or even my family. because they won't last long enough for me. my "long" is "forever". Is hard to tell things that can stayed the same for a long time..exspecially forever. Somewhere.somehow.Maybe it does exist. But poorly I can't be the lucky one who felt its existence. A blog is an essay that can improved my education. Thats why I began to write. I care for my education more than everything.cause I don't have a hobby. I have no talents. I am just depending on my education. It doesn't look bad but u can be satisfied with it if u r not that picky. But improvement is needed.